In The Doghouse

It never ceases to amaze me how little it takes to entertain my kids.  Be it a plain old cardboard box or an empty freaking roll of toilet paper, and they’ll go to town with it for hours on end.  Lately, though, it seems they’ve decided that the dog crate is where the party’s at.

Now I have no earthly idea what first possessed my son to decide to crawl into the crate, but it’s surprisingly become an everyday ritual.  He plays video games, bounces rubber balls, and basically just chills out in there.  He’s also talked his twin sister into joining him in the dog’s den from time to time.  And if I call and call and can’t find him anywhere in the house?  Well, I’ve learned the hard way that I’ll more than likely discover that he’s hiding in the damn crate.  And would you believe the boy even attempted to hold a playdate in there?  Luckily, though, his friend wasn’t really down with the whole idea.  I ended up having to draw the line the other night at naked chilling in the crate, however.  A freshly showered kid in the buff most certainly does NOT belong in the 4×3 stank of the pooch.

And the dog isn’t really sure just what the hell to make of this new-found craze.  He stares at the kids through the bars like he’s been burglarized or something.  I’m sure he’s confused to shit about this sudden interest in his little lair.  The kids must have sensed his uneasiness because I heard them discussing whether or not they should make reservations with the pup in the future.

Now you’re probably thinking that I’ve just discovered the secret to success since my children are happily entering a lockable box out of their own free will, right?  And if I moved the crate in front of the t.v., well then I’d have THE definition of a live-in babysitter.  Slip some food in through the cracks, and voila!  Believe you me, I’ve thought long and hard about this and the many potential benefits it could produce.  Unfortunately, though, my children like to talk.  And I don’t think it would go over so well at school if they told their teachers that they spent the night in the dog crate.

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19 Responses

  1. I can definitely see where he’s coming from…

    As kids, my brother and I turned everything into a fort. We draped blankets over the top bunk to cover the bottom bunk. That became a fort. We turned over empty refridgerator boxes sitting by the curb. That became a fort. The dog crate is just another kind of fort; built better, but smells worse.

    • Forts are really all kinds of awesome for a kid, aren’t they? Just wish they’d pick a building site that didn’t smell like the dog’s ass…..

  2. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! I’m imagining the conversation with the teacher….

    Holy COW!!

    Thanks for the laugh!
    M

    • U betcha! Thanks for reading about my crazy kids & feel free to use this disciplinary tool on your own family. 😉

  3. My kids love dog crates, too! And don’t think my husband and I haven’t shared that look of “eh, how bad would it be to park them in there for a while?”

    I’ll never forget my husband saying – when I was pregnant – “Wow, this is going to be way different than having a dogs, because I guess we can’t go out to dinner and leave the kid in a crate. Can we?” He was kidding. Mostly. And yeah, parenting people is way harder than parenting dogs!

    • I don’t know — our dog is a total pain in the ass, so it might be a toss up as to who’s harder…..

  4. Thank you so much for posting this picture. I will be using this as a new discipline tactic. I can hear it now: “See THESE kids are the well behaved kids, see them? See how good they are? Now get in that crate and play!” Mommy has a book to read. Right? RIGHT?

    • Yes, exactly! And make sure you’re holding a glass of wine in your hand when you carry out this discipline tactic. I promise it’ll be that much more effective. 😉

  5. This is brilliant. Just don’t call it “dog crate” and you will be fine. “Play Room” “Kids Room” “Fun House” whatever rocks their boat and everybody will think of you as just another totally awesome mom.

  6. One of my daughter’s fave places at my sister’s is in the dog crate – what is the obsession with those things? They’re smelly, nasty, and full of hair! lol

    • I think it’s all about the “hideout”. Never mind that it smells like the dog’s ass — it’s still a good place to hide! 😉

  7. I always loved a good refrigerator box!

  8. Okay, that is hilarious. Actually my sister sent a pic of my nephew in their dog crate. But inviting others in… now that’s just cute! I know a good cardboard box was always good for my son 🙂

    • I seriously think they’d hold their next birthday party in there if I’d let ’em!

  9. That’s hilarious.

    And how many times have I spent a gazillion dollars on a xmas present, only to find the kids playing with the stupid cardboard box it came in instead? MANY!

  10. As kids, my brother and I often played in the dog cage!

  11. When I was first married and we got our dog, we crated him. Some friends came over to our house with their little girl and she proceeded to promptly enter, close and stay in our dog’s crate. I was HORRIFIED. She had the best time!! Now that I am a mom of two. . .I’m thinking where is that damn crate?!?!?!? My how times change! ;)-

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