Who’s Running This Show?

jlo0047l     

     As far as I know, my job description as a parent does not say anything about serving as a punching bag for my kids. I know I don’t always make the best decisions and by no means am I a model parent, but I do know when to draw the line and stop my kids from acting inappropriately. However, some parents seem to be way too easy on their kids and allow them to just walk all over them.   Just over the past weekend, I came face to face with some of the most horrendous behavior I’ve seen in a long, long time.  And you all know that I not only live with twins, but I also now live with a furry-fied version of the son of Satan. So, I most certainly know about bad behavior!  However, I am absolutely and completely appalled by the way some parents allow their own kids to treat them.  Whatever happened to living by the phrase, “I brought you into this world, and I can take you right out of it”?  Sadly, it seems that many of today’s parents just let their kids wear the pants and run the whole mother truckin’ show.  

     The first shocking display of misconduct occurred at the soccer fields.  A little six year old boy ran over during a break to ask his mom if she’d brought his water bottle, and when she told him that she’d forgotten to bring it, this little punk had the audacity to actually kick his poor mother repeatedly in the shins.  I was in shock and think I may have even silently yelled out, “WTF?!”  I could not believe that a kid could have that big of an ego to think that his very own creator deserved a beat down for not bringing a friggin’ water bottle?!  Get your own stinkin’ bottle, you little bastard!  I’m pretty sure the woman was mortified to be treated like this in front of all the other judgmental parents out there, but she really didn’t even address the issue at all. She just kind of brushed over it and moved on with her conversation. I’m telling you right now that I would’ve marched my son’s little smart ass straight to the car and then all the way home.  

     The second disturbing incident occurred at a local neighborhood bar and grill.  This one particularly obnoxious dad was out to dinner with his sons, completely ignoring them in lieu of his cell phone.  At the end of their meal, one of the sons was trying to get Distant Dad’s attention so that they could leave and catch a movie.  Now, granted, the dad was totally clueless, continuously talking business REALLY LOUDLY on his cell phone, but this did not in any way warrant the kind of eruption that soon followed.  The son started to get more and more fired up when all of his efforts were continuously brushed off, so he grew louder and louder in his cries for Dad.  The pleading soon turned into hitting, which then turned into fist pummeling.  Before I knew it, the kid was literally punching the crap out of his dad’s back while screaming for him to get off the phone.  It was such a loud and violent outburst that all eyes in the restaurant immediately turned to this table in horror.  The worst part was that the kid was probably about ten or eleven years old and way too old to be throwing a temper tantrum.  And just like the episode at the soccer field, the dad never even attempted to discipline his bratty-ass kid.  They simply paid their bill and left for the movie.  Again, my kid would most certainly not be rewarded with a movie after pulling a Mike Tyson on me like that.    

     I just really don’t get this parental lack of interest in teaching our kids how to behave both at home and especially in public.  Are parents just too thinly stretched these days to be actively involved in the disciplining of their offspring?  If they are, then we are in serious trouble as a society. Sure, everybody’s tired and stressed and busy as can be, but family should always be the first priority.  Good behavior isn’t something you can pick up for your kids at the mall, and it’s not something they can attain by popping a pill.  It is the job of the parent to get off his/her ass and teach it to the kid.  And not only is it the parent’s responsibility to teach it, but it is also up to the parent to demonstrate good behavior himself. There are already enough adult yahoos in this world as it is. Do we really need our youth to grow up to become a-holes as well?

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11 Responses

  1. I agree completely. It baffles me that parents don’t seem to notice or care that their kids are turning out to be little bastards. Just last week, a kid in our neighborhood stomped on my daughter’s stomach after she had fallen on the ground. WTF? Firstly don’t take the kick someone when they are down phrase so literal, little shit, and second, what kind of boy hits or kicks a girl? I went outside and unleashed my Mom-fury on bastard child and he hasn’t come back to our end of the neighborhood. And this boy was also old enough to know better. He’s in 4th grade!! What I’d really like to do is print up business cards with the information to contact the Jim Fay institute and info on where to purchase some love and logic books. Cause they need them. Sorry for ranting on your post, but yeah, I really do agree!

    • Good for you for sticking up for your daughter! That’s completely out of line & that little punk needed to be called out on it. Maybe if parents were more like you & aware of what was going on with their kids, some of this behavior could be stopped.

  2. No kidding! That’s crazy! When i worked at a daycare, I had a 4 year old who would beat the crap out of his mom. She could get him to stop by giving in to his demands, sometimes for new, cool shoes, sometimes for candy, etc. One day he hit her in our classroom and when I took the trash out 15 minutes later, she was sitting in her car in the parking lot, sobbing.

    • Wow! A four year old??!! That’s just inexcusable! What is wrong with that mother that she allows that kind of behavior? She has clearly forgotten that SHE is the adult! How pathetic.

  3. I think there is such a FINE line in society today when it comes to societies views on parenting. On one hand you have these instances where the children seemingly are running the show, and of course the other end of the spectrum being abuse. Now of course there are ways of dealing with these bratty children, but I think parents feel limited. By the time the kids are this big of brats, talking does not work any longer. And I think there is a difference between light corporal punishment and abuse, society no longer tolerates any form of physical punishment. All it takes is one spank, one little snap, and some overnosey person nearby who has no clue of the whole scenario turns you into CPS. So I think sometimes parents are afraid to put children in their place.

    • That is a good point — it’s sad, but there are lots of looky-loos out there who always want to be up in everyone else’s business and wouldn’t hesitate to jump to some sort of awful conclusion without really knowing the whole story. However, I truly think parents need to start working on their discipline strategies when their kids are little so that it doesn’t get to be out of control as the child gets older.

  4. Brilliant. Thank you for this. I posted something similar on my own blog after witnessing incredibly obnoxious behaviour in Niagara Falls back in July. I was jus astonished at how some parents just… allow. They allow their kids to do ANYTHING. I can’t even begin to comprehend the logic behind it.

    Unfortunately, my post was met with a lot of people saying things like, “You can’t control your child’s behaviour” and “You have to pick your battles” and I just kept thinking, “Yes, you can” and “As long as you’re approaching them the right way, EVERY ‘battle’ is worth ‘fighting’, because it’s a lesson.”

    And yeah, it’s not fun to play the parental role. But that’s what we signed up for when we had kids. You aren’t their friend, you’re their parent. You can be their friend later, when they’re adults.

    • I completely agree. I think too many parents want their kids to think of them as “the nice guy”, when that’s not really our job. I used to be a teacher & saw up close & personal how true that old saying is about the apple not falling far from the tree. If parents act like complete idiots, their kids are gonna act like complete idiots. Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that out.

  5. OMG! I was in Wal Mart like a month ago and some kid was in the toy aisle and wanted this new toy. She told her mom to buy it for her, and the mom said that she couldn’t because she didn’t have any money and her credit card was maxed out. That kid then had the guts to say, “Then get a new credit card and buy it for me NOW!” I was stunned by this display. All I have to do is point my finger at my 1 1/2 year old and she knows to stop her shit or she is getting punished when she gets home. I just can’t even beleive some people.

  6. Sometimes it feels like punishing my kid is just for show since he just gets out of time out (or whatever punishment he’s had) and does it again and again. But at least I’m trying! I don’t know why people can’t make the effort to discipline their kids. It’s sad…and a bit scary.

    • I know just what you mean — it’s frustrating when you’re trying to teach them & feel like it’s going in one ear & out the other. I’m not only going through that with my twins but also with this crazy puppy we have. I’m about to pull my hair out, but I’m at least trying!

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