Changing of the Guard


     I know I may complain about him being sloppy and about how much he procrastinates, but I gotta hand it to my hubby for steppin’ up to the plate this past weekend.  He must’ve realized that I was at the absolute end of my very frazzled rope with the new puppy and him being out of town ALL last week.  It was WAY more stress than I had envisioned, and I realize now in hindsight that the timing could not have been worse. I was like a shaken up bottle of Diet Coke just waiting to blow my top.

     Since I was so sleep deprived, the hubs took it upon himself to get up with both the dog and the kids at the first sign of day on both Saturday and Sunday.  He even herded them all to the backyard so the house would stay nice and quiet for me.  Good man. Mama needed her sleep, especially after that little rendezvous with Benadryl (necessary for the itchy bumps the dog hair caused me) and one too many glasses of Chardonnay.  He also spent a significant chunk of time trying to work on training the dog, only to come to the same conclusion as me — that we have, in fact,  purchased an insane baby alligator.  

     Now, that’s not to say that everything was all sunshine and rainbows.  The kids, of course, decided to make up for lost time with Daddy and show him how well they’ve learned to let things go in one ear and straight out the other.  I could hear his frustration mounting over having to repeat the same damn thing about two hundred and fifty thousand times.  Of course, I just sat back and observed because we all know that payback’s a bitch.  I was so glad that he was getting a little dose of just what all he’d been missing — one big happy, albeit apeshit, family.  

     I had to just overlook the fact that my kids were running around the backyard still wearing their pj’s well into the afternoon.  And I had to just bite my tongue and turn the other way when I saw that the pile of crap on the kitchen counter may very well have rivaled the Sears Tower in height.  And I had to just let it roll off my shoulders when my husband came back from the grocery store with quite possibly the cheapest toilet paper ever manufactured — seriously, we might as well just wipe our asses with sandpaper.  None of these things could overshadow the fact that the man was giving me a much needed breather.  I was so beyond grateful to have any kind of break whatsoever from the constant chaos that has become my life.

     My gratitude was only compounded after I ran into a friend of mine on Sunday who was complaining about her lazy husband.  She was out trying to run errands and said that he was literally calling her every three to four minutes to tell her to come home and feed the kids lunch.  She was on the verge of tears as she told me that she was really sorry but she needed to run.  I stood there in awe at the audacity of the whole ordeal.  Could the dude really not slop together a flippin’ pb&j for the kids?  Seriously, any moron can do that. Thank God my husband can not only make a mean pb&j, but he can also fire up some chicken nuggets in the microwave like nobody else’s business.  Now, he may not sail the boat exactly like I do, but at least he keeps it afloat long enough to give the captain a little catnap.


5 Responses

  1. Yay for your husband. I never can understand the”helpless” husband. My hubs could always take care of the girls. One day when my oldest was about two, he put together an outfit that was so crazy, I actually taped a sign to her back that said “My daddy dressed me today”! The neighbors loved that one.

    Sounds like you have a keeper.

  2. My hubby is so funny. He can feed the girls–nuggets and stuff, which is fine–but not himself. When I get home, he’s like a hungry dog. I’m pretty sure that before he met me, he could make a sandwich, but it’s like he has amnesia now?

    And kathygee1, I am so with you on the outfits. My hubs will let Miss D. out of the house wearing the wildest crap ever and her hair uncombed–which for her, means FRO. She looks like the worst trash when he’s in charge…but at least he *does* it, so I shouldn’t complain.

    This post made me laugh!

  3. Insane baby alligator…LOL!!! I love it!

    Hubby may not do everything the way that you would do it but, so what?! The kids were fed, happy and safe and you got a much deserved break. This is so worth it…..even if you are wiping your butts with sand paper this week. (Hee hee) You’re a lucky lady; hold onto this one for a while!

  4. Crap! I must be doing something wrong! Last week I replaced the kitchen floor, washed and re-hung curtains and this week I mowed the lawn, woke up with the kids and made them breakfast (old fashioned oatmeal I might add) and my wife didn’t blog about me! Oh wait…I have the blog..NOT HER!

    • You should have her be a guest writer on your blog so she can totally toot your horn for all to hear about how much you rock as a hubby. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: