Too Much Together Time

1994-05-07[1]    It is becoming very clear to me with each passing day that we are getting more and more ready for school to start.  All this “together time” here at Grammy’s house is going to either drive my kids to claw each other’s eyes out or send this here mama straight to the loony bin.  Even fun activities that I am certain that they’ll like turn into shoving and/or shouting matches.  I’m wondering if we are going to be outlawed from Grammy’s neighborhood altogether by the end of our visit.

     Since the kids have learned to ride their bikes with no training wheels, we decided to bring them down here with us.  The only problem is that Grammy’s hood is much different than ours.  They actually have driveways, whereas we have unattached garages in the alleys behind our houses where we live.  My kids are not used to watching out for cars turning into and backing out of driveways.  They are used to just barreling down the sidewalk at full speed.  So, in order to prevent them from turning into pavement pancakes, Grammy came up with the idea to take their bikes down to the church around the corner and let them ride around the enormous parking lot.  It seemed like such a brilliant idea at the time.

     So, yesterday morning, I packed up the kids and the bikes and headed over to the church parking lot.  I thought the kids could get rid of some of their bottled up energy while I could sit and do a little bit of writing.  Really, though, I don’t know who I was kidding.  I mean, these were the same two wild banshees who were just caught using rackets as weapons in Grammy’s backyard.  And sure enough, we weren’t there for more than ten measley minutes before the claws came out once again.  All that massive amount of wide open space, and they decided that they both just absolutely had to be on the exact same strip of asphalt.  My daughter started screaming at my son, who then started screaming right back at my daughter.  This was then followed by an outburst of tears from my daughter and a series of smirking and snickering from my son, which led to further shrieking from my daughter.  It suddenly dawned on me that my children were about to throw down IN THE MIDDLE OF A CHURCH PARKING LOT!  I was seriously waiting for God to come bursting through the lobby doors right then and there, shaking his holy finger at my little heathens.  Either that or I was prepared to duck for the inevitable lightning that was sure to strike down at any given moment.  After this little moment of clarity about just where this whole sibling rivalry was all going down, I packed up the bikes and declared the ending of yet another “fun” little adventure. 

     When we got back to Grammy’s, the kids each enjoyed some “alone” time (AKA time out) while I took deep breaths and checked the calendar to see just how many days we have left of summer break.  I was so looking forward to having this week and next to really enjoy spending good quality time with the kids before they start back to school.  I’m having a hard time with the “quality” part of our time together because I’m too busy being pissed off at them!  I really didn’t want them to answer the question, “What did you do over summer vacation?” with a reply of, “beat the crap out of my brother/sister.”


6 Responses

  1. Hurray for year-round school! Of course now I have to worry about being late & not turning in papers, but I get 7 hours of no shrieking and almost 3 hours of strictly “me” time.
    I know you’re jealous. 😉

  2. You know, I determined that kids, especially mine, have memories like puppies. They are scolded and then run right back for more – sometimes with a smile on their face.

    Who knew?

    I’m thinking G-d saw the throw down coming – that’s why you got the alert. Besides, G-d has a little throw down once in a while as well. 🙂

  3. Hilarious!! Thanks for sharing, but sorry for your misery!!

  4. Oh my. That was a mess. At least the parking lot was empty so no one else saw. You know. Except God. LOL!

    • Ha! Yeah, I guess God always has a front row seat to my misery, doesn’t he?! Thanks for reading — always love to get new readers! 🙂

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