Croc of Crap

07252008_crocs    My kids absolutely LOVE to wear their Crocs.  They are all about a shoe that they can just slip on their feet and run out the door.  And since we are ALWAYS late for everything, any time we can shave off the whole process of packing up to go somewhere is very much welcomed.  The kids aren’t allowed to wear them to school for safety reasons, so this summer, they have worn the absolute hell out of them.  

     When I first started buying Crocs for my kids, I made the stupid mistake of getting roped into buying those little doo-dads that go in the holes. Naturally, my kids wanted to be like all their friends and have their entire shoes covered with these decorative little pieces of crap.  At a $1.50 to $3.00 a pop, I must’ve spent a small fortune on doo-dads, only to have them fall out within a week and be lost forever.  I recall one time on the beach when my daughter lost her favorite doo-dad, and we were on hands and knees sifting through sand to try to find the freaking thing.  I’m pretty sure that was when I drew the line and professed to never buy doo-dads again.  Total waste of money!  

     My other complaint with Crocs is the way my kids’ feet look when they take them off after a long day at camp or even after just playing in the backyard.  They often look as if they’ve been using their feet as spatulas to make mud pancakes.  I’m talking toenails crammed with dirt and jet black heels that leave footprints wherever they walk.  I have seen other kids’ feet after wearing Crocs, and they aren’t even a fraction as dirty as my kids, which makes me wonder what in God’s name my children are doing in theirs!  People often gasp when my twins remove their shoes, and then I feel the need to explain that I really do bathe them!  We stopped by a friends’ house the other day (who just so happened to have WHITE carpeting), and my kids actually had to slip on socks over their dirt-caked feet in order to go inside. It was a little embarrassing, I must say.

     I have spent an endless amount of time scrubbing the aftermath of this oh-so-convenient style of footwear.  I often ask myself if these holey slip-ons are making my life easier or just more difficult.  Yes, it gets us out the door more quickly, but it also gives me yet another mess to clean up later on. And we all know how much I enjoy messes…<insert sarcasm>.

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5 Responses

  1. I am proud to proclaim that I have never bought (and do not now own) a pair of crocs.

    My aunt would always laugh when an old fad would come back around saying we had already “Kicked that to the curb”….and crocs to me are “jellies” gone wrong. (I’m sure I don’t need to remind you about the issues our parents must have dealt with when we all wanted jellies)

    • Oh, jellies were just all kinds of wrong, weren’t they??!! As for the Crocs, I only buy them for my kids. I am so not a fan of adults wearing Crocs. Yuck, yuck, and more yuck.

  2. ewww…I forgot that some adults wear them. I just meant that I never gave into the kids wanting them.

    We have enough trouble with the few pairs of flip flops they “had to have”.

    Give me sandals anyday.

  3. Oh, I know exactly what you mean. My daughter has dirt RAMMED so far underneath her toenails from those stupid shoes!

    She LOVES them, so what are you going to do…

    • I guess I’ll continue to bitch about them & scrape the caked dirt from their little toenails after each time they wear them — they love ’em too much to actually ban them. Thanks for reading and for sharing!

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