Daddy/Daughter Dance



     Last night was a very big night in our house.  It was the Daddy/Daughter Dance for which my daughter had been waiting on the edge of her seat for weeks. She absolutely could not wait for this special night with her dad.  She was even more excited to be going on a double date with her best little girlfriend and her dad (who just so happens to be one of my husband’s favorites of all the dads).  So, it was a win-win situation for both parties involved.

     It was no shock to anyone who knows my daughter that she picked out the pinkest dress she could possibly find in her closet to wear. She had two very important wardrobe stipulations:  it had to be VERY pink, and she had to be able to twirl in it.  Her final selection covered both of these criteria. Because she was going on a date with her daddy, we decided that he should probably coordinate with her outfit.  So, we went shopping yesterday afternoon for a pink tie to go with my husband’s suit.  Now, I wasn’t even sure if he would actually wear a pink tie, but I figured he wouldn’t be able to resist my daughter in all her dolled-up charm.  We even took the dress along to the mall to make sure we picked out just the perfect shade. My daughter was very particular about which tie looked best, and of course, following in the footsteps of her mama, she had her heart set on the most expensive one.  What can I say?  The girl’s got good taste!  

     As an added bonus, my husband very sweetly decided to stop at a florist on his way home from work and pick up a little flower corsage for my daughter to wear with her dress.  Unfortunately, they didn’t have one small enough, so, instead, he bought her the absolute cutest little bouquet to carry.  She was over the moon when he gave it to her, and I almost cried at the extreme cuteness before me.  

     We took lots of pictures before they headed off, my husband decked out in his pink tie and my daughter clutching her tiny bouquet.  They raced off, and I had to wait in anticipation for hours to hear about the details of the evening. My son and I went out to dinner with some friends in the meantime, so that he didn’t feel left out of all the fun.  When my daughter and husband finally returned home, it was more than obvious that they’d had an awesome time.  My daughter had so much fun dancing that she didn’t want to come home.  Apparently, she’s a dancing machine just like her mama.  It was definitely a very sweet moment that I’m sure they’ll remember for a long time.  Now it’s time for a Mama/Son Dance, so we, too, can get our groove on….


My Brain’s Vacation Day


     Yesterday was one of those days that I either wanted to rewind and start over or fast-forward and get to the end of it.  (It’s probably safe to say that I was leaning towards the fast-forward to get the freaking thing over with and behind me!)  I just couldn’t seem to get anything right.  My brain was scattered here and there and pretty much everywhere.

     It started with me realizing that I had completely confused the date for Kindergarten Field Day (where the kids play a bunch of games outside instead of doing school stuff — yes, they actually get to play! Imagine that!)  I had told my husband that it is this Friday, so he had rearranged his work schedule in order for him to be there.  Well, it turns out that it’s actually TODAY! I got an email YESTERDAY from one of the room moms detailing the activities that are to take place. (In my defense, though, I am not the only parent who had the date mixed up — many of the kindergarten events throughout the year seem to be better understood through word of mouth.  If you don’t ask questions, you will be left behind in the dust.)  Needless to say, my husband will not be going to Field Day with me today — he’s not too happy about that.

     Then, I completely had a brain fart about my son’s soccer game last night. His team was supposed to have a make-up game for one that was rained out a few weeks ago. I was rushing everyone around, trying to get them dinner, dressed, and packed up for a 6:00 game.  It dawned on me at about 5:20 that I should probably double-check my email to make sure I knew what time he needed to be there to warm up.  Turns out it was a 5:00 game!  I wanted to just punch myself in the face.  I felt so bad telling my son that once again, Mama had goofed.  Luckily, he didn’t seem to be too heart-broken about it, especially when I told him that we’d go out for ice cream with sprinkles.  I guess when you’re six, sprinkles make everything better.

     At the end of the day, I was so glad to finally crawl into bed. I had to take Benadryl for yet another allergy attack, so I slept like a baby. The day is still young, but I’m hoping my brain is back from vacation today.  

     What kind of spacey mama moments have you experienced?  How did you CYA and recover from your blunders?

I’m On The Phone!


     If I ever need to get the attention of my kids, I swear all I need to do is attempt to make a phone call.  They could be completely oblivious to the fact that I’m even in the house, but the minute I pick up the phone, they are all over me.  Someone’s tattle telling, fighting, taking a poop, singing, crying, and, in general, just misbehaving, all while I’m trying to carry on a civilized conversation with the person on the other end of the line.  

     Just yesterday, when I was trying to make an appointment over the phone, my son decided that was the absolute minute he needed to play Uno with me.  I must’ve told him a hundred times that I’d have to play later, but it didn’t seem to register with him even one little bit. He went ahead and dealt out the cards anyway.  Every time I’d walk around the corner to another room to be able to hear better, here he’d come with my cards, whining about it being my turn.  How could it be my turn when I wasn’t even playing in the first place??!!  

     I’ve tried everything from forewarning them before making a call to hiding in a closet.  NOTHING WORKS!  They always find me!  I thought it would get better as they got older, but it most certainly is not.  In fact, I think it might even be worse.  I feel so incredibly rude when I constantly have a three ring circus going on in the background of a serious phone conversation.  It is a real challenge to focus on something when your twins are using you as the free space in their obnoxiously loud game of tag.

     I’m at a loss and could use some serious advice.  Somebody out there MUST have some ideas in their back pocket, other than opening up a good can of whoop ass.  So, what do you do to preoccupy your clan while making phone calls?  Do tell….

Put A Cork In It


     It is certainly not uncommon for kids to collect things — Matchbox cars, Webkinz, Pokemon cards, etc.  My son, however, collects wine corks!  I can’t really even remember when the fascination all started, but he absolutely loves them.  He keeps them in a special keepsake box that I got as a gift when I was pregnant.  You’re really supposed to put pictures and baby memorabilia in it, but, instead, it is stuffed full of corks!  

     I’m sure that he easily has over 200 different corks in his collection by now.  And just to be clear, they are not all from me!  I do love my wine, but my son has both my parents and my mother-in-law saving corks for him, as well.  He even tries to nab them from other people’s houses, too.  Over this past weekend at holiday BBQ’s, I caught him retrieving a few out of our friends’ trash cans!   

     I am constantly finding these corks scattered throughout our house, too. My son often forgets to put them in his special box and sets them on the kitchen table or on the coffee table.  They end up rolling onto the floor, only to later be discovered by the vacuum under the sofa.  Sometimes they even end up in my shoes — my daughter thinks it’s hilarious when I try to slip my shoe on, only to be blocked by a cork in the toe.

     I keep asking my son what it is that he ultimately intends to do with all of his corks.  I’ve suggested making a picture frame or a shadow box with them, but he somehow has it in his head that he’s going to build a floor to ceiling sculpture with them.  Who knows — maybe someday it’ll be proudly displayed at the MOMA, and we’ll all be popping a Dom Perignon cork to celebrate….

Smack Talk


     One of the big topics of conversation in our house this weekend was about good sportsmanship.  I never thought I would be discussing this with my kids about KINDERGARTEN soccer, but I guess I was sadly mistaken. Just when you think you really know your kids, they go and do a 180 on you….

     Apparently, my daughter was smack talking on the field with some of her teammates at her soccer game on Saturday morning.  They were giving their goalie a really hard time for not blocking a goal. Luckily, their coach overheard them and completely busted them. She gave a big talk at half-time about supporting each other and being a team player.  I was listening on the sidelines, trying to figure out what mean little brats she was referring to.  I asked my daughter if she was one of the smack talkers, and she looked me right in the eye and told me no.  Of course, I believed her because I never could’ve dreamed that my sweet little baby girl would purposely hurt someone else’s feelings.  I mean, we’ve talked many many times about how it doesn’t matter if they win or lose — I’ve got her trained like a seal to say that what matters most is having fun, or at least I thought I did.

     When we got home from the game, I was telling her how proud I was of her for trying her best (she did actually score the WINNING goal!) and how disappointing it was for her teammates to be such bad sports to their goalie. For some reason, I started to have a weird suspicion that she was somehow involved in the trash talking.  I asked her about her involvement again and instantly knew she had lied to me when her eyes became fixated on the ground.  She finally admitted it — the little stinker was most certainly right there in the middle of the meanness.  I could not believe it! All those times she’s robotically told me that it’s ok if her team didn’t win — but, apparently, it’s definitely not ok with her!

     We had a long talk about how much it would hurt her feelings if her teammates were giving her a hard time about making an honest mistake, and that team work is about cheering each other on at all times.  She seemed to be listening (although with six year olds, you never really know). I really hope she understands this very important lesson.  I’m definitely not trying to raise some little punk.  We shall see — their next game isn’t until next Saturday, and I pray that I don’t have a little Tonya Harding on my hands…..

Oh, Snap!

     Since yesterday was yet another gorgeous day here, I took the kids over to the beach after school to meet some of their friends.  We live in the Great Lakes area and are very fortunate to have a huge, beautiful beach just five minutes from our house.  My out of town friends are always surprised when we take them to our beach because it truly is like a Florida beach.  We practically live at this beach in the summer because we are all secretly beach bums.  

     The outside temperature yesterday was a perfect eighty-five degrees, with nothing but sun and blue skies overhead.  The sand was even hot under your feet.  The water temperature, though, was quite another story.  It was flat-out, freaking C-O-L-D!!!!  The other moms and I wouldn’t even let our kids get in the water because it was so flipping chilly.  So, it was nothing short of an “Oh, snap!” moment when my daughter’s little friend’s favorite bucket got swept away and ended up about a half mile away from the shore.

     Now, in my head, I was thinking how much that sucks that the bucket was gone.  Even though the little girl was clearly upset, you couldn’t have paid me to drag my ass through that freezing water to fetch a damn plastic bucket.  This little girl’s mother, though, immediately whipped her skirt off and started out after the bucket.  I told her that she deserved the Mother of the Year award without a doubt — I mean, we’re talking about wading through fifty-five degree water in a bikini!  Unfortunately, though, the bucket had sunk by the time she got all the way out there.  I felt so bad for the mom, whose chattering teeth and pissed-off look said it all when she got back to the shore.  She admitted that it wasn’t worth it in the end.

     And just as I was saying how she’s a better mom than me for going in after it, I looked up to see my son’s Croc floating away in the lake, as well. Son of a bitch!  A shoe is a bit more essential than a bucket, so I, too, was then forced to drag my bikini-clad derriere into that frigid water.  Luckily, I was able to retrieve the shoe, but I had to spend some time thawing out once I got back to the beach.  It was seriously like an ice bath in that lake!  We then moved EVERYTHING we brought to the beach far, far away from the water.  No one was going back in, unless an actual person was floating away.  Oh, the things we mothers do for our kids….


Negativity Positively Sucks


     When I was at the beach yesterday avoiding the zillions of things I should have been doing, I started thinking about how judgmental and petty the world seems to be.  I was laying there watching these college-aged girls giving every person who walked by the old once-over.  They would whisper and giggle and roll their eyes, clearly criticizing something about the person’s physical appearance.  It was truly nauseating to me.  

     Why is it that people, especially women, do this to each other? Haven’t we got enough things to worry about without having someone critique us from head to toe?  I realize that many people knock others down to pick themselves up.  To me, though, it is so much more interesting and challenging to try to find the good things in a person. Anybody can find the negative, but it takes some real brain power to find the positive.  

     I really want to instill this idea into my kids’ little minds as early as possible.  They are so innocent and oblivious to people’s differences right now.  They do not see color or weight or namebrands.  To them, people are just people.  Why can’t we all think like that?  Why do we have to become so jaded and opinionated as we get older?  I guess that’s why they say that childhood is such a precious time.  

     What particular value do you hope to instill in your kids?  How do you intend to teach it to them?