BIG ANNOUNCEMENT!!!! As of today, this blog is going to be moving over to my own URL address! I am so happy and proud to present to you the new nuckingfutsmama.com! Please visit me over there for lots of nucking futty fun as well as a giveaway later this week! Be sure to bookmark the [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | 8 Comments »
** A splinter in your bra does not make for happy boobs. ** The inventor of summer camp deserves the Nobel Peace Prize. ** There’s a reason for that whole “dog chewing the slippers” stereotype. Just ask my Uggs. ** Single parents are the hardest working people on the planet. ** “The Today Show” REALLY [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: dogs, family, family pet, kids, moms, motherhood, parenting, poop, Scotch tape, stress | 16 Comments »
I realize that I’ve pretty much done nothing but moan and groan over the past two weeks with the hubby being out of town for so frickin’ long. Can I help it, though, if my fairy godmother decided to go off on a bender and that the shadow of doom chose to make my household [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: bath time, dogs, family, hugs, kids, laundry, moms, motherhood, parenting, pets, Some, stress, twins | 11 Comments »
For our family road trips to be uneventful, it would take nothing less than a damn miracle on earth. Seriously, put the Nucking Futs Family in a car, and you’ve got yourself some serious drama on wheels. And I guaran-frickin’-tee you that you that by the time you reach your final destination, you will be [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: car sickness, family, kids, moms, motherhood, nausea, parenting, road construction, road trips | 3 Comments »
My husband says I’m a marketer’s dream. (Guess it’s a good thing I married someone in advertising then, huh?) I’m a total impulse buyer and can be so easily swayed by the so-called “promises” of a product. Perhaps that’s why I was swept right up into the whole hoopla of the Keratin hair straightening craze. [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: birthday, hair, hair care, husband, Keratin, present, stylist | 14 Comments »
** Summer break is the equivalent of a homefront civil war. ** August is a REALLY long way away. ** Babysitters make everything better. ** If I had a penis, it would be a “ginormous” one, according to my son anyway. ** BP sure must like the taste of feet in their mouth. ** It’s [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: BP, dogs, family, husbands, kids, moms, motherhood, parenting, stress, summer, summer vacation | 7 Comments »
Yesterday was a day when I needed much more than just an IV of caffeine. Hell, what I needed was more like a damn IV of margaritas! Cause yesterday? Well, yesterday was pretty freaking sucky. Any time that sandy poo is part of a trip to the beach is a day that I’d rather just [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: beach, Eiffel Tower, family, kids, margaritas, moms, motherhood, parenting, poop, sand, stress | 18 Comments »
Have u met my family room sofa? You know, that one whose piping is poking out the edges, whose cushions are covered with water stains and whose edges are all frayed along the skirt? Yes, I’m talking about the one that’s too shitty to even be considered for a fraternity house. Let me refresh your [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: family, family room, fraternity, furniture, kegs, Penn & Teller, salesman, shopping, sofa | 16 Comments »
There are many phrases that instantaneously fly out of my mouth at this point in my life that I never ever thought I’d hear. And yeah, I blame it ALL on parenting. Cause kids? They just constantly do weird shit. Here are just a few of the ridiculous words that I’ve uttered over the past [...]
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tagged: baseball, bathroom, dog, family, kids, mommy, moms, motherhood, parenting, school | 27 Comments »
